Monthly Archives: August 2006

Now is the time for all…

What are you supposed to do when you realise that the generally accepted implementation of “Democracy” is totally undemocratic ? Would it be right to break the law in order to change it ? How would you begin ?

It’s becoming increasingly apparent to me that the whole concept of party-politics is totally broken. If you become a member of a political party you are expected to follow the party line even if you disagree with the point they are pushing. If you get outvoted you have to push your opponents point of view, despite it frequently being diametrically opposed to yours. To me, these days at least, that is tantamount to being a traitor, and every day we watch these traitors giving passionate speeches on TV and radio promoting things they did, once, disagree with. Whether they have changed their opinion through loyalty, persistence, or by 1984-style coercsion doesn’t matter; surely that’s ridiculous. Why do we have political parties ? Why do we have professional politicians ? None of it makes any sense to me any more. At the last general election there were many, many independent councillors who were derided by the conventional parties as being ‘single-policy’ options. But what is wrong with that ? At least it’s honest!
So many times we heard angry people who were standing against their traditional party of choice (usually Labour) because they felt angry enough to do so. So many times we heard the phrase “I don’t know anything about politics, I just…” and it gave me a small shot of joy.
Surely democracy is about the people and should involve them. If someone feels that their environment is being ruined by people in the wrong then they should should be able to stand against them. And personally I’d much rather have an impassioned person acting on my behalf than some party-monkey who does just what the leader wants – especially when the leader is a deluded, power-tainted, corrupt, messianic, nutjob.
The old saying that power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely has never been more clearly demonstrated than now.

Back to the mundane, it’s been a good few days. A fun, albeit surreal, night in Greenwich on Friday lead to a relaxed weekend. Saw some great films, had a superb curry and it culminated in a kebab at my mum and dads with Frances and Marshall which was the perfect end to a nice weekend. In fact the only downside of the whole thing is my bed: it’s crap and full of pointy springs. I can’t wait until we get to Philadelphia and can invest in a luxury bed…

A Scanner Darkly

Last night Tony, Zap and I went to see A Scanner Darkly at the New Jersey theme park that is the Greenwich peninsula. The whole evening is as close to perfect as I could imagine – got there on time, had a nice glass of wine, managed to get free tickets from the lovely Mark, saw an excellent film then went to a great pub. Years ago, Alex gave me a copy of the book and I can’t tell you how much I loved it. Perhaps because I was concerned about the film ruining it, my expectations were mixed, but it was superb; I’m still buzzing when I think about it. Visually mind-blowing, great acting (especially Robert Downey Jr) and true to the book. It’s well worth seeing in a cinema by the way – and you won’t have to worry about the related distractions like kids and shouting, because all of the dickheads will be in the theatre next door watching Snakes on a Plane.
First time in the Vanbrugh Tavern too. Their award-winning garden deserves to win an award.


Orange SPV M600 looking gorgeousSomehow I managed to persuade Orange to upgrade me to a brand new M600 [HTC Prophet]. Despite running a lame operating system, it really is a top piece of gear. It does 802.11 (wireless lan), bluetooth, GPRS and Infrared, which means I’m always on the Internet! Joy! I can even run SSH on the thing, and my old MMC card (together with the MP3s on it) fits perfectly. Skype even runs on it – in fact I managed to have a conversation, albeit stilted, with someone on Skype earlier today.
My old 6230 was a wonderful machine, but this is mind blowing. Once Linux manages to do slightly more than boot on the thing, it’ll be the best bit of hardware ever…apart from the M600+ which is already out…


4 old recordings from the archives are up for any old gits who may be interested to hear what we all used to get up to in our bedrooms in the 80’s and 90s’:

Please do not confuse this with an endorsement of myspace – that still sucks hard. But at least they let you host MP3s…

War Is Peace

Now that the nasty Lebanon business is “finished” we can turn our attention away from Israel’s break of the ceasefire, and the thousands of innocent bodies, and look back to the mass-murder currently going on in the New Democratic Republic of Iraq. We are now being asked to give a monkey’s toss about Saddam’s trial for his genocide of the Kurds.
There was a very interesting exchange on the Today programme this morning between Sadakat Kadri, John Humphries and MP Ann Clewyd (Blair’s human rights monkey). Mr Kadri wondered aloud why the democratic trial had skipped over the issue of the Kuwait invasion, suggesting that it might sound too much like the US/UK invasions of recent years and perhaps highlight the hipocracy of the situation. Ann was quick to defend by asking “have you actually been to Iraq ?” Mr Kadri had to accept that no, he hadn’t….but what difference could that POSSIBLY make ? Humphries lept on this golden opportunity and got her to admit the undeniable truth that the place is fucked, and even the UK ambassador had said that “civil war was more likely in Iraq than democracy”. Despite the fact that this is an example of lead-weight understatement, and that what he meant was “Jesus Christ get me out of here there’s a bloody civil war going on!” she had the nerve to try and argue that it “wasn’t all bad”…YES IT IS! It’s very, very, very, bad indeed. And it’s YOUR FAULT. The only cheery thought I have is of you and your bastard, murdering, colleagues sitting in your retirement homes looking back at the mass murder that you were directly responsible for and worrying about your progress in the afterlife. Don’t worry – your seats are already being warmed by the horned one in anticipation.

It’s great being an atheist, you get to taunt religious people with their own inventions!

Meanwhile, back in the UK, the mainstream media have picked up on the fact that PFI is bleeding us all dry, ruining everything we hold dear in order to line the pockets of a handful of cynical over-rich bastards. Despite Private Eye printing the gory details of this malfeasance for many years the mainstream have only just scratched the surface. Of course, none of it makes it into the popular press because that’s got its hands full generating mass panic about the phantom terrorists.

Apologies for the tone of this blog. I ran out of anti-depressants a couple of days ago. We did have a lovely day in Blackheath yesterday though, so it’s not all bad.

Where is Chris the Greek ?

The only question on the minds of the regular readers of “Dodgy” Dave Courtney’s blog at the moment is “Where is Chris the Greek ?” Let me tell you, if I was Chris the Greek I would have gone into hiding at the North Pole with a lifetime supply of immodium by now. Dave’s blog is a truly fascinating phenomenon because it is, as far as I can tell, genuine; although “Mad” Frankie Fraser may disagree. The temptation to get a subscription for his live-cam site is torturing me but I just can’t bring myself to do it. In fact the temptation to get the bus over to Plumstead and seek out Camelot is getting me twitchy too.

Two shags for PM

Prescott: Bush is crapOur Deputy Prime Minister seems to be slowly turning into Roy “Chubby” Brown. When he’s not rogering his secretary, punching protestors in the face, playing cowboys with American businessmen, commenting on the environment from the back of one of his Jags, or playing croquet, he occasionally finds time to discuss world affairs and illuminates us all with his insightful thoughts using his trademark, colourful, working-man’s language. So John, what do you think of that George Bush then ? “Well he’s crap isn’t he”…

This man should not be Deputy Prime Minister, he should be Prime Minister! It would be wonderful! Like some sort of liberal Nosher Powell. For the first time since Margaret Thatcher we would be goverened by someone who speaks their mind. No more would we have to cringe as we watch our supremo fetching sticks thrown by Bush, or wonder what is really going on in his mind; he would tell us in terms we can all understand. And what a wonderful statesman he’d make; any crap from the foreign johnnies and he’d be right in there and clump them – that’ll be the end of that.


Ange asked:

“Do you think there’s any market for a computer program that just sits there and occasionally compliments you ?”

Now, Friday night is the traditional night for sitting in the pub, talking rubbish, getting inspired, and making resolutions, that in the cold, sober, light of the following day I don’t recollect at all.
But this one I remembered! So simple and yet so brilliant, it could rid the world of all bad vibes! So, I went ahead and wrote kimibhut: Winblows only at the moment, it sits on the system tray and occasionally pops up a message telling you how great you are. And, for the first time ever, I’m keeping it running all the time because it really does make me feel better about the world. It also has a mode for masochists that insults you instead. Something for everyone.

This evening contained another huge reminder about how fast time is passing. After one of my mum’s award-deserving roast lamb and yorkshire pudding dinners, my parents’ neighbours turned up to say goodbye as tomorrow they are moving away. This made me quite emotional because, apart from liking them, we’ve known them for about 15 years. We’ve watched them have a child, who is now a young lady, had Christams day with them, helped Dad and friend try to sneak back into the house when they were so pissed they could hardly walk, and generally enoyjed having them as my parents neighbours. I’ll miss them.

Lily Music

Despite incurring much derision from friends and workmates, I really like Lily Allen…in fact I might even be a fan. So, how excited was I when we discovered she was filming a music video right next to the office I work in? They’d redressed a launderette as a cafe and a cornershop as a fruit stall…I don’t know…and neither did the production team when I asked them. When my mate Andy told them I was a fan they told me Lily was only standing round the corner and suggested I said hello. Suddenly I turned into a giggling 12 year-old and ran off, just like I did when I met the Blakes 7 actors. It’s a funny thing, but I’m normally pretty irreverent; as soon as I come into contact with someone I admire I turn into this schoolgirl twat. Later on I tried again; another workmate, Lisa, walked up with me to where Lily and the possee were hanging about. As soon as I saw her red dress from a distance it happened again and I buggered off. What a berk eh ?

Leg it for Lebanon

pic of me on the marchSomewhere between 20,000 (the Police estimate) and 100,000 (the organisers estimate) people turned up in Hyde Park yesterday in order to trudge to parliament square in protest at Blair’s support for Israel’s massacre of the Lebanese. It was all good, angry fun (apart from the sweat and thigh-chaffing) and very reassuring to see such a huge turn-out.
Afterwards, Tony and I had a couple of pints. One on the chavvy deck of the Tattershall castle floating pub, and one in the Sherlock Holmes surrounded by loud German tourists. Nothing like it. Under normal circumstances we’d probably had a few more but the night before was a tad heavy. In fact I was lucky enough to witness some of Tony’s pre-puke drunken yoga moves.
A friend of mine wasn’t happy about the whole idea of this protest as she felt that it was simply a huge anti-Israel/pro-Hizbollah movement. There were lots of reasons why I disagreed with her and we had a brief email debate about it before I went. During the march a little kid gave me a sticker that read “Hands off Muslim Countries” which I proudly wore for the rest of the day. It was only as I removed it today that I noticed the little URL at the bottom: Oops.

Vodaphone, clearly recognising the profit potential of 100,000 people all trying to meet up with their friends in a huge park with mobile phones, sent a bunch of “promotions girls” along to give out lollipops to the protestors and coppers. I wonder if that same little boy managed to persuade them to wear hizbollah stickers on their vodaphone t-shirts ?