Monthly Archives: July 2002

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Its hot, muggy, I’m sunburnt and all 5 channels are showing sport. There’s nothing else anymore, just Big Brother and Sport. And now BB is finished too so it’ll probably be replaced by more sport.
What do you mean turn off the telly ? Don’t be ridiculous.You’ll be suggesting I read a book next.

Apple Computer: What drugs are you on ?

Apple Computer: What drugs are you on ?

Sadly I suspect the answer is ‘coffee’. That can be the only explanation for the massive mood-swings from which you seem to be suffering. Perhaps a course of psychotropics would sort out your heads. Or perhaps some Lithium ?

One minute you’re a bunch of friendly, creative techies who just want to make their loyal users lives better. Then suddenly you’re a corporate monster that makes Microsoft look like Christain Aid.

Here are some examples:
Apple: Hey man, we’ve put an Open Source Unix variant in our new OS and anyone can download it work on it and play with it. We just want to make you happy.
Users: Nice one! This looks great! Powerful and Stable. I can’t wait to upgrade my OS9 machine.
Apple: Upgrade ? Fuck you there’s no upgrade – buy it you cheap fucks.
Users: Oh ok. Sorry. Well after all at least I’m not giving my money to Bill Gates – at least Apple is on our side.
Apple: Yeah man – Don’t follow the breadhead fascists at Redmond – they’re like the man. Come with us! Look, see how all of the buttons look like jellybeans ?
Users: Yeah they look cool. Oh hold on, this doesn’t work properly. Oh neither does this. Hmm, or this.
Apple: Tough shit! You think writing this sort of OS is easy ? You ungrateful bastards. Keep using 9 if that’s the way you feel. Oh by the way, we’re dropping support for that soon. HAH!
Users: but…but…but…
Apple: Hey, don’t panic! 10.1 has fixed most of those bugs and we’ve got all sorts of cool extras like LDAP support and SMB is working nicely! Loads of people have been carbonising their apps so that all your favourites will work natively!
Users: Yay! where do I sign up for the upgrade ?
Apple: Fuck you! You want it, you pay the full price. Oh and it’s gone up too. You people make us sick!

etc ad nauseam

Apple – your biggest asset is a massive, blikeredly loyal, customer base who would continue buying your products even if they didn’t work at all. Even they will get pissed off and go elsewhere if you carry on like this.

Tim evicted! Sadly he appears to be too stupid to realise why everyone hates him…and it’s not because he’s “older than his years”…COMPRAAAAWNDEZ ?

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It’s the little things…
Sitting in a nice flat, watching some really superb telly and drinking a cheap bottle of red wine. Sometimes life is good.
Always recognise when you are enjoying yourself, otherwise you’ll miss it…what a waste. It’s an excellent feeling when you realise that actually life can be enjoyable. Even if it’s just because you ate a good pizza.

Tonight, BBC2 had the second part of their series ‘the secret life of the office’. It looked like a brilliant piece of hard-hitting satire by Ken Loach. But it was real. I’ve never seen a more perfect microcosm of capitalist society. Sadly, my lack of skill with the English language prevents me going into further detail about the content of the programme. Borrow a video, hassle the beeb for a DVD release, do anything you can but watch it. Watch the opressed working classes cry and become ill with stress as their self-esteem is sapped forever. Watch the ruling classes complain about the wobble in their custom made rare rainforst furniture and then piss about with brainstorming sessions while they earn 4 or 5 times as much as the people doing the actual work. Watch the middle classes succumb to pressure from their superiors and pass it on to the proles with threats and worthless rewards.
It’s all there.

Anyone reading this who is contemplating suicide, please consider this: If you have given up on life then you are in a unique position – you have nothing to lose and can do whatever you like. Every fantasy you’ve ever had about killing your boss, pissing in the ‘PowWow Water’ storage tank or murdering the next person you see dropping litter, you can fulfill! The worst that can happen to you is not as bad as you’d planned for yourself.
Take some of them with you!
Don’t take an overdose! Force your way into the board-room of Cap Gemini with a bucket of weed-killer, a bag of sugar and a lighter! Go on! Enjoy yourself!

Goodnight campers.

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Nice weekend. Not only did the sun come out but I got to spend some time out in it, in the park, with friends.
Dave, a very good friend who I hardly ever see, was in London after going on his first spanish package holiday. He was with his girlfriend, Sharon, whom I’d never met before – and she’s great. She taught me a new word, dreich,which means “English Weather”. I’d put money on those two ending up together forever…

Dave, Sharon, Andy ( another good friend I haven’t spoken to for far too long) and I met up in Greenwhich park and sat down in the sun a lot.
Then we wandered over Blackheath and had a pint in the Princess, after which we went to the Thai restarant and pigged out on nice thai food…damn..mixed seafood in thai chilli sauce is good. In fact we had to go to O’neills first because the thai place was choca but that was cool – haven’t been there since Dircon and it brought back some really dodgy drunken memories 🙂
Funnily enough on sunday I had another Dircon moment; Andy and I went to Hilly fieilds for a walk and bumped into Mark, a guy from Dircon. Andy stayed the night after we spent everal hours discussing things of great importance the previous night :).

It’s been over 48 hous since I took my last Lustral and I’m feeling it badly. Michele being away is really rough. It feels like I’m only half here. Hopefully this is the worst I’m going to feel until I get the new prescription. Bad as it is, I can deal with it in the knowledge that the repeat script should be ready tuesday.

Another real bastard is tha AudioGalaxy has gone. I don’t care what anyone says – fo…
oooh…michele just rang – I feel a lot better!

Time for bed.

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OK, I know you’re supposed to blog daily but…well to be honest the lack of cash is beginning to drain any sort of creative thoughts from me.
Since the last bolog Michele has aged a year, and we’ve celebrated another anniversary – 5 years! Wooden. Very odd, especially as I’m only 12.