The case of the barred phone, the fillet steak and the evil drawer

Alex was in the country for one day and I haven’t seen him since he went to Mexico. He called me on friday morning and we arranged to meet up after work. All he needed to do was call me on my mobile and we could arrange a time/place. The day passed and no call arrived. At some point I needed to call Steve at work and was informed that my phone was barred. I couldn’t even call the provider to ask about it! It turns out all of our work mobiles were barred…becuase the bill hadn’t been paid. Again! Arrrggghhh. Sorry Alex.

We nearly came unstuck on Saturday night. Michele and managed to pick up some fillet steak for less than half price due to a labelling cock-up (thanks Sainsbury!) So we were going to have Steak and onions for dinner. In preparation, I opened the kitchen window so that Michele wouldn’t suffocate on onion fumes. This meant I had to close the kitchen door so Humph couldn’t get out. One of the kitchen drawers was stuffed tightly withh all sorts of crap, and was blocking the door, so I squeezed it shut and closed the door.
Anyone with a single active neuron would not have done this, because they would have realised that once the door was pulled closed, the drawer would have sprung open, thus preventing the door from opening. I however, am clearly a dullard.
So, I had locked us out of the kitchen in such a cunning way that no amount of locksmith skill, picks or drills would allow us back in.
Aha, you say, but you had opened the window! Why not climb in ?
Because, this being a basement flat in New Cross, we have bloody great iron bars in front of it.
Eventually we hit upon the idea of using some sort of stick to try and push the drawer shut. The only thing that looked like it might do the trick was the hoover nozzle. So, I went outside and pathetically tried to push the drawer in with a hoover nozzle, that was far happier to twist around rather than apply force. Meanwhile Michele kept her eye on the drawer through the little glass window in the door and attempted to open the door just as I managed to push the drawer in. What a couple of pratts.

Anyway, we managed it eventually. Had a delicious meal of the most tender steak I’ve ever encountered, and watched SuperSize Me which nearly made us yak it all down the bog. Worth watching though.


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