Lawyers

Down with everything that sucksDespite being a boring git, the last few days have been thoroughly thought provoking. The last two days of work consisted of being at a conference at a stupidly pretentious hotel in Kensington, albeit extremely well put together. The decor is so OTT they have art-deco designs on the wooden flat-screen monitors. However the food, organisation and staff were top notch. Being the only long-haired bearded scruff bag there (with one exception see later) made the whole experience quite unpleasant because everyone else was a white male in a grey suit. OK, there were two asian women in suits and possibly an asian man. But out of 60-70 people it was a total sausage fight. There was a woman speaker who, despite having a PhD in business bullshit, was introduced as “single, with a better golfing handicap than anyone else here and likes to drive fast cars” so she doesn’t count. Having a MegaCorp ID badge got me and my line manager a seat at the captain’s table for lunch. It also earned me the cleanest ringpiece in Christendom 🙂 Again, the food was superb, it’s just sad that the table consisted of such different personalities. Apparently the evening meal had a “carribean” theme with steel band, palm trees, the lot. No one seemed to see the irony that there wasn’t a black face in the joint. This is how the world is run – politicians, businessmen and officials are all white men in suits. No wonder the world is so fucked. Apart from the disturbing political aspects of the days, it was more difficult to deal with the boredom invoked by the event. The company trying to shift their shit (it was a sales conference but disguised as a “customer forum”) basically exists to defend other companies from litigation and help them develop a case. In fact the whole industry surrounding this event was involved in legal affairs. I’m sure they do a good job, but wouldn’t it be far simpler and cheaper to take all of the lawyers, throw them against the wall and shoot them in the face ?
Instantly the whole problem vanishes. We could save billions! No wonder the lawyer with a keynote managed to make a few jokes – the geezer’s laughing all the way to the bank. He cashes in even if he gets sued!
So come on people – shoot any lawyers that you know. Even if you like them, think of the destruction, waste and misery they cause. Please. Do it for Jesus.


In other news, there was a chirpy Norwegian guy at the conference who told me how astonished he was at the lack of jeans there – I liked him. Also I went to an anti-war demo on Saturday with Dave et al – made me feel sort of cleansed.


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