Spot the difference.
\nFirstly, this from Monty Python and the Holy Grail:
\nMORTICIAN: Bring out your dead!
\nCUSTOMER: Here’s one — nine pence.
\nDEAD PERSON: I’m not dead!
\nMORTICIAN: What?
\nCUSTOMER: Nothing — here’s your nine pence.
\nDEAD PERSON: I’m not dead!
\nMORTICIAN: Here — he says he’s not dead!
\nCUSTOMER: Yes, he is.
\nDEAD PERSON: I’m not!
\nMORTICIAN: He isn’t.
\nCUSTOMER: Well, he will be soon, he’s very ill.
\nDEAD PERSON: I’m getting better!
\nCUSTOMER: No, you’re not — you’ll be stone dead in a moment.
\nMORTICIAN: Oh, I can’t take him like that — it’s against regulations.
\nDEAD PERSON: I don’t want to go in the cart!
\nCUSTOMER: Oh, don’t be such a baby.
\nMORTICIAN: I can’t take him…
\nDEAD PERSON: I feel fine!
\nCUSTOMER: Oh, do us a favor…
\nMORTICIAN: I can’t.
\nCUSTOMER: Well, can you hang around a couple of minutes? He won’t be long.
\nMORTICIAN: Naaah, I got to go on to Robinson’s — they’ve lost nine today.
\nCUSTOMER: Well, when is your next round?
\nMORTICIAN: Thursday.
\nDEAD PERSON: I think I’ll go for a walk.
\nCUSTOMER: You’re not fooling anyone y’know. Look, isn’t there something you can do?
\nDEAD PERSON: I feel happy… I feel happy.
\n[whop]
\nCUSTOMER: Ah, thanks very much.
\nMORTICIAN: Not at all. See you on Thursday.<\/p>\n
Secondly, this from the BBC:
\n“I’m standing here, in the vatican, in the final few hours of the Pope’s life.”
\nN.B. This is nearly 24 hours since he was given the last rites.
\nWith all the prayers that people are saying for him, through waterfalls of tears, I confidently expect him to live forever! Go Go The Pontiff!
\nExcuse me, an atheist, for asking such a “naive” question, but, why are people praying ?
\nTo keep him alive ? Surely not! Whatever happens is God’s will! He’s God’s chosen chap, so what can prayer do at all ? Answers on a bogroll please.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Spot the difference. Firstly, this from Monty Python and the Holy Grail: MORTICIAN: Bring out your dead! CUSTOMER: Here’s one — nine pence. DEAD PERSON: I’m not dead! MORTICIAN: What? CUSTOMER: Nothing — here’s your nine pence. DEAD PERSON: I’m not dead! MORTICIAN: Here — he says he’s not dead! CUSTOMER: Yes, he is. DEAD […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-615","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/615","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=615"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/615\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=615"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=615"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=615"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}