{"id":204,"date":"2009-05-22T04:14:46","date_gmt":"2009-05-22T04:14:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/bologs\/vng\/ullo-john\/"},"modified":"2009-05-22T04:14:46","modified_gmt":"2009-05-22T04:14:46","slug":"ullo-john","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/ullo-john\/","title":{"rendered":"Ullo John&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Our obnoxious Buick is now becoming a burden and so we decided to take him to the glue factory and get another motor instead. Tonight we went to a Honda dealer, armed with a car loan draft, and asked to see the Honda Fit we&#8217;d got our collective eye on.<\/p>\n<p>Michele has been reading up on a lot of car-sales tactics and not only that, she knows quite a few people (including her mother) who have worked in dealerships, so we were well prepared.<\/p>\n<p>Let me tell you, they tried <i>every<\/i> trick in the book, including:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Leaving us alone for a while so that we would talk to each other &#8211; without realising that they were listening in<\/li>\n<li>Repeatedly going off to appeal to the boss for a discount and returning with &#8220;a very generous offer&#8221; that sucked<\/li>\n<li>Telling us we were robbing them&#8230;&#8221;you&#8217;re holding me up at gun point&#8221;&#8230;&#8221;you&#8217;re going to get blood on the seats&#8221; etc ad nauseam<\/li>\n<li>Telling us that &#8220;we&#8217;re already making a loss on this deal&#8221; to which I responded with a laugh<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>We offered to trade in our Buick, and received the response we expected &#8220;I&#8217;m being overly generous offering you $350 for it. I&#8217;ll be lucky to get $100 for it.&#8221; Really ? What a nice man you must be! Paying $250 just for our happiness!<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Well,&#8221; I replied, &#8220;it&#8217;s worth more than that isn&#8217;t it? I mean, even if I donated it to the Sally Army I&#8217;d be able to claim a grand off taxes.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The guy agreed!<\/p>\n<p>Twat.<\/p>\n<p>The debate continued, and I had to keep repeating that whatever offer they gave us, we weren&#8217;t going to pay more than &#8220;$xxxx and a Buick&#8221;. But they kept trying it! Every clich&eacute; you can imagine. Eventually, to the massive disappointment of our very nice salesman, the anger of the top-boss, and the amusement of some other dude with a shockingly obvious syrup, we left.<\/p>\n<p>But we left with our bank draft, our dignity, in our Buick, and with our arses intact. I&#8217;m waiting for the call to Michele&#8217;s mobile tomorrow when the boss arrives and realises that they rejected a reasonable offer to rid their premises of a donkey. I call it a donkey because it&#8217;s clearly not popular and that&#8217;s probably owing to it&#8217;s colour: it&#8217;s a sort of metallic-browny-orange. Normal people would hate it, Michele loves it, and I couldn&#8217;t give a toss.<\/p>\n<p>Honestly, it was like dealing with used-car salesmen.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Our obnoxious Buick is now becoming a burden and so we decided to take him to the glue factory and get another motor instead. Tonight we went to a Honda dealer, armed with a car loan draft, and asked to see the Honda Fit we&#8217;d got our collective eye on. Michele has been reading up [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-204","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/204","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=204"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/204\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=204"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=204"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=204"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}