{"id":1020,"date":"2015-04-05T20:43:09","date_gmt":"2015-04-05T20:43:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/?p=1020"},"modified":"2015-04-05T20:43:09","modified_gmt":"2015-04-05T20:43:09","slug":"an-open-letter-to-septa","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/an-open-letter-to-septa\/","title":{"rendered":"An open letter to SEPTA"},"content":{"rendered":"

Dear SEPTA<\/a>,<\/p>\n

Our relationship has been going on for over seven years now, ever since I moved to Philadelphia, and I\u2018m sure you\u2019ll agree it\u2019s as strong as ever. As a someone that doesn\u2019t, and never has driven, I\u2019ve been a user of public transport all my life and so I\u2019ve got a lot to thank you for; without you I couldn\u2019t possibly live in Philadelphia. You\u2019ve looked after me and helped me live a comfortable and productive life here, and obviously I\u2019m grateful. You know how strong my feelings are for you and I\u2019m always ready to jump to your defence when people unjustly criticize you or make wrongful allegations. A transportation system is far more complex than most people realise and keeping it working is tough, yet you really do an awesome job and in many ways I\u2019ve found you to be even better than my ex, London Transport. But as with all relationships it\u2019s not perfect, and there are still a couple of things that we need to sort out. <\/p>\n

Firstly, your fare and ticketing system. It\u2019s ok for the most part – and I\u2019m not even worried about the prices – must make a change eh? For everyday inner-city travel it works adequately. And if it was 1970, it could even be regarded as quite advanced. You have these tokens that are each valid for a single ride, no matter where you\u2019re going, on the bus or the various types of subway-type systems and that\u2019s great. I can pay cash exact-fare but you want to discourage that because it\u2019s a whole load of aggravation you don\u2019t need, so that will cost more. Yeah I understand that too and so the tokens work, even though I have to make an extra trip on a bus to find somewhere that actually sell the bloody things, since there is nowhere in my neighborhood. <\/p>\n

Except for the times when they\u2019re not valid and except on your \u201cRegional Rail\u201d, which is apparently different to the other types of rail, like the trollies.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll overlook that these distinctions are far from obvious from your maps and literature and deal with the everyday experience of living in the Philly area which implies a knowledge of these distinctions. <\/p>\n

So, I need to take a couple of buses to work. Easy right? I just need to make sure I buy a metric shed-load of tokens and it\u2019ll cost me two tokens per journey. But what\u2019s that you say? I can save money by getting a \u201ctransfer\u201d? Cool! Is that another type of token? No. Cash only and exact fare. Hmm, ok well that\u2019s irritating but you\u2019re doing me a favour price-wise, so fine.
\nOh yes, did I mention that one of the buses I need is the 124?<\/p>\n

Oh dear. Suddenly, with that simple revelation, all of the harmonious simplicity goes out of the window. The 124 and 125 buses are \u201cspecial\u201d for some reason. They call them \u201cexpress\u201d buses but it\u2019s not because they\u2019re turbo-charged or anything – it\u2019s because they go a long distance west on the expressway. Other buses that use the expressway (eg the 9 and the 27) are not \u201cexpress\u201d and so work normally. Hmm.<\/p>\n

For the luxury of travelling to work on an \u201cexpress\u201d bus, a token must be accompanied by some more cash – there\u2019s no way to do it with tokens. For me, the extra amount is currently around $1.25, which again must be in exact change. So pre-buying a load of tokens is no longer the only thing I have to do – I also have to ensure I have pockets of singles and quarters every day. The good news is I can use a Transfer so my total journey costs a token and $2.25 which is pretty reasonable, it\u2019s just a pain in the arse. <\/p>\n

Another bizarre thing about the 124 and the 125 is that the extra cash is required even if you travel within the city limits! From 30th street station to Wissahickon there are several buses available. They all cost a token per ride except the 124 and 125 which require the extra cash! Even though that part of the journey is identical and travels on the same roads and in the same types of buses, if you do it on the 124 and 125 you have to pay extra for the privilege. On being told this by a driver I was incredulous and checked it with several different SEPTA sources who all confirmed that this bizarre charge was correct. Not one could explain why, and not one disagreed when I asked them if they thought it was stupid and unfair.<\/p>\n

The reason I need the 124 by the way is that at some point in one of my previous lives I must have done something terrible, and have been punished by the gods into repeatedly having to work in miserable King of Prussia, and the 124 and 125 are the only reasonable methods of getting to work. There\u2019s no train. Yet. I know one is planned and because I\u2019m in my early 40\u2019s I may live long enough to see that line opened if, god forbid, I\u2019m still working in King of bloody Prussia then. <\/p>\n

Like all of my fellow passengers I completely rely on these services and therefore so do my employers. A huge number of tech companies are based in that area for some sodding reason and so a big chunk of the economy relies on these buses for those who don\u2019t drive.<\/p>\n

Up until now I haven\u2019t mentioned the other method of paying for rides: passes. Obviously, I don\u2019t faff about with tokens and change any more, I use a pass. But unlike just about every other public transportation system in the world, it\u2019s actually more expensive for me to use a pass! Yes I pay for the privilege!<\/p>\n

And it\u2019s here where the bizarre fare structure starts to reveal itself.<\/p>\n

The regular bus-pass is known as a \u201cTranspass\u201d and if you live and work in the city it does exactly what you\u2019d expect. You can move around on any big bus-like thing with wheels without needing any cash. Except regional rail. You can\u2019t use regional rail. Except on the weekends. I know.<\/p>\n

Oh, and it doesn\u2019t work on the 124 or the 125 either! You have to pay the bizarre extra cash like you would with a token. And as the passes are even harder to come by than the tokens it really doesn\u2019t help me much. Again, even if you want to hop on a 124 for a few stops in Center city with a Transpass, you still need to pay the extra cash. That is mental.<\/p>\n

King of Prussia is outside of the city limits and into the \u201czones\u201d, which makes it sounds like some terrible post-apocalyptic nightmare. Which it is. After a great deal of consultation with a number of Septa representatives I\u2019m of the opinion my workplace is in Zone 2. I can\u2019t be sure because I\u2019ve never seen an accurate map of the zones, and even though I believe such a thing exists there\u2019s never been one to hand at any ticket office I\u2019ve ever been present at. I have my faith though.<\/p>\n

So I need to up my game if I want a pass, and the best option I have is known as the \u201cTrail Pass\u201d. It is the platinum card of passes and even allows you onto regional rail! But this works out way more than paying for my fares piecemeal. Arrrrgh.<\/p>\n

There is, however another option that would appear to be a closely guarded secret: the Cross-County pass. So secret is this card that I\u2019ve had staff at Suburban station swear blind to me that it doesn\u2019t exist. <\/p>\n

This pass is specifically designed for people who travel out into the hinterlands and I\u2019ve used it in the past. Despite being much cheaper than the Trailpass, its magic is strong and it too allows travel on Regional Rail and buses, but like all magic it has dangers. The biggest danger being that you can use it with a 124 and 125 without paying an extra fare only if you don\u2019t travel into the city! Which entirely buggers up my reasons for wanting to use it. As soon as the bus hits the expressway I owe an extra $1.25. <\/p>\n

There is another method method of getting to work. It would involve getting a train to Norristown, then a bus to King of Prussia Mall, from where I can pick up the 124 for the rest of the journey to my office. All of this without costing me any extra money! But of course it does carry the hidden cost of my will to live. <\/p>\n

What\u2019s strange about this journey being valid is that if I paid for it in cash, it would be way more expensive than getting the bus all of the way there! It also allows me to travel right down to the end of my road…because the pass is valid further into Center City on the train than it is on the bus! Again, this sounds absolutely insane, but I have validated that it is indeed the case. <\/p>\n

So I can travel from King of Prussia to my house on this pass only if I use the, normally far more expensive, train option. If I want to use the cheaper and more direct bus, I have to pay extra! <\/p>\n

So clearly I need to buy a zone 2 Trail pass. This works properly and despite being out of pocket I settle for this option because it removes a massive amount of mental stress caused by my brain trying to work out why the fare system is so arcane. Despite the awesome power of the Trail pass I can no longer use the backup option afforded to me by the Cross-County pass: getting the train via Norristown. Why not? It\u2019s valid on the regional rail after all! Well, it\u2019s because somehow, Norristown is in zone 3. What shape are these bloody zones? But as that\u2019s a last resort route anyway, I\u2019m not too upset.<\/p>\n

So SEPTA, that\u2019s the fare structure dealt with. Thanks for listening, and I hope you\u2019re not offended when I refer to your fare system as being \u201cinsane\u201d and \u201cmental\u201d. It\u2019s for your own good. But there is another source of concern I feel it\u2019s only fair to address: your parochial attitude! Sometimes it feels as if you\u2019re less of a 21st century transport system in a 1st world city, and more of a peak hours mini-bus service in the backwaters of the Northern Territories of Australia!
\nIt\u2019s 2015 and your phantom \u201ckey\u201d service still hasn\u2019t launched and so we\u2019re still having to deal with all this stupid cash and paper nonsense. Tokens in the 21st century? What\u2019s wrong with you? I have to physically travel to a place to buy a pass – have you not heard of the Internet?<\/p>\n

And I hate to keep banging on about the 124 and 125 but there is another seriously backwards problem with them: on the journey from King of Prussia to Center City, the bus doesn\u2019t always stop at Wissahickon, a major transfer center. According to your documentation, we have to ask the driver to stop there if that\u2019s where we want to go. \u201cG\u2019day mate, can you drop me off at Dingo Creek as you\u2019re going near there?\u201d
\nNow, most of your excellent drivers realise that this is ridiculous requirement and always go via Wissahickon because a huge number of people rely on it as an interchange point. Now and again a driver will yell out to the bus as a whole and ask if anyone needs to go there. That\u2019s still backwards, but fair enough – at least we\u2019re given the option.
\nBut occasionally a driver will decide that because nobody has specifically asked them to stop there, obviously no-one is interested and so they go straight to 30th street with a bus-load of pissed off commuters – content in the knowledge that according to the rules, they have done nothing wrong. Indeed, should anyone express dissatisfaction with this state of affairs they will quote the SEPTA regulations at them. Which calms everyone down perfectly as you\u2019d imagine.
\nHow about we drop the \u201crequest\u201d service and just stick to the schedules, as if we were living in a civilised 21st century society. <\/p>\n

And why are there so few services on the weekends? You do realise that people won\u2019t start to consider public transport as an option if the option is crap don\u2019t you? <\/p>\n

So there you have it SEPTA. After all of this negativity it\u2019s important to know that I still love you and will stick with you come what may. But we both know you can be better and if you still want to become one of the world\u2019s flagship Public Transport networks you\u2019re going to have to encourage more people to ride. We can work through this. <\/p>\n

I\u2019ll see you Monday morning.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dear SEPTA, Our relationship has been going on for over seven years now, ever since I moved to Philadelphia, and I\u2018m sure you\u2019ll agree it\u2019s as strong as ever. As a someone that doesn\u2019t, and never has driven, I\u2019ve been a user of public transport all my life and so I\u2019ve got a lot to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1020","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-open-letter"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1020","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1020"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1020\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1021,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1020\/revisions\/1021"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1020"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1020"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatsquirrel.org\/oldfartsalmanac\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1020"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}